Extremely Lame

I’m thinking the same thing you are right now, “Kmart’s still around?” Apparently they are, and they’re selling draw string sweatpants that say “True Love Waits” on the left thigh, and right across the ass. There’s nothing like trying to sell not having sex than by putting a message like that on pants that can come off in half a second and in a place that makes people stare at your ass and crotch.

Of course, Kmart is stammering and backpedaling by saying that these pants aren’t trying to promote a specific message or organization. You know, if you’re going to have an agenda, at least cop to it. And if you’re going to deny it, at least change your website where it claims these very same sweatpants carry a “bold abstinence screen print.”

While I think it’s kind of dumb to have an abstinence message on pants that are pretty much designed to encourage anything but, I don’t really care if some high school kid wants to wear these pants. It’s her choice, she can do whatever the hell she wants to. I mean, even if you’re really anti-abstinence only, you have to admit that it’s better than the babydoll t-shirts for ten year olds that say “Porn Star” or “Sperm Dumpster” on them in glitter.

Back in my day (I love saying that), we had the Coed Naked and Big Johnson t-shirts, so I won’t say that this is some sign that the youngsters are so terrible and jaded and wacka wacka wacka. Of course, even back in high school I thought they were pretty much a sign that said “I’m trailer trash,” the Big Johnson shirts especially.